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As of late I've been falling iAs of late I've been falling in love with forest fires and wild running rivers,
And it's left me charred like a flood over a burning barn
before fire safety was a priority at office meetings.
Driftwood as big as houses clog up my heart in a landslide of apparent indifference,
like I cared about the first farm in a tornado but quickly after a monsoon tragedy became a rain shower statistic.
I think I'm sadistic, but if I am what does that make the women with hurricane hips and the men with jaw lines like Mount Rushmore who put me here.
I wanna answer the big questions in life, like how did I become as cold as the snow cap on Everest,
And how did my chest become as frosty as the death zone beneath the snow caps.
I want to go back to base camp, make a nice cup of coffee and talk about those that didn't scale to the top but gave it their all trying.
Can someone fly by in a helicopter and pick me up from the summit of my self loathing?
If you do please fly me over the forest fires, running r
My heart can't be stolen. I keMy heart can't be stolen.
I keep it in a vault in Switzerland,
2 kilometers beneath the snowy ice caps
Under the feet of bankers and the blondes.
I keep it encased in cobalt,
silver-gray metal masking the blue beneath.
No super spy, no jewel thief,
not even the cast of Oceans 11
can get to my heart,
sealed in cobalt, locked up in that vault.
I keep it there, my blue beating heart,
I keep it from a lifetime of hard knocks,
away from the tragedy, the good times and the bad.
I don't want to break the vault,
To smash the cobalt, to set free what is chained,
To give my chest that blue beating heart.
'Cause without the vault, without the cobalt,
I might get broken again.
Row BoatsI wanna be a boat afloat on your heart,
drifting on the seas of your never ending eyes,
rowing across those broad beach smiles.
I’m sailing on a blue ocean of you
and if you sink me I guess I’ll swim,
Back to my row boat afloat on your heart, again.
You remind me of graffiti, no You remind me of graffiti,
no one see's the love
unless they look at every stroke
of spray paint on the wall.
Every etching in a bathroom stall,
every stroke of paint on an embankment wall,
even broken chalk scrawl on the pavement,
reminds me of you.
You remind me of graffiti,
and I see the love.
Cupid's arrowsCupid's arrows aren't warm or loving,
when he draws from his quiver I quiver,
I shake, rattle and shiver,
because of Cupid's icy arrows.
I feel like my wooden heart's
been shot up so much
it looks like a junkie's arm.
You see, Cupid doesn't work for me,
what that cherub doesn't realise is that
my heart only burns when broken.
Our Cold WarShe's like Soviet Russia,
drinking cheap imitation Vodka
and reading Karl Marx
for the first time since 1917.
And just after Khrushchev's loaded up some nukes
marked 'Bound for Cuba',
well that's when it hits me.
It hits me like a bullet in a parade,
like the Bay of Pigs,
like an invasion of Vietnam,
like the nuclear winter that never came,
I love you, Soviet Russia.
BlackoutOn a whiskey fueled rampage
Through the darkness of the twilight,
An anarchist without the movement,
Slashes signs with spray paint
And power lines with his hate.
A city gone dark
At the hands of one man
Spreading Christmas cheer anarchy
Like a ski mask Santa Claus
In the middle of May.
He's running now,
Kissing the night in flight,
As candles light up
And red ringed glares
Scream out from suburban skies.
Atop a hill he stands,
Overlooking the blackness.
The torches shine like spotlights,
Looking for someone who's already vanished
Into the dark.
The Ocean is Six Miles DeepThey say love is not for the meek,
It's for those who seek and those who find.
There's no room for the passive
And for those who dive head first
Into love's vast ocean, I salute you.
But there's one thing everyone forgets,
The ocean is six miles deep
And I don't think your breath will keep
In a six mile free style.
Those that reach the end
Out of breath and haggard,
Often find no happiness,
It all, love has devoured.
Forest firesForest fires burn for years in your eyes,
And every time they meet mine
I feel like someone's gonna shout 'Timber!'
Because I'm falling for you all over again.
I feel like those flames won't ever dim,
Even when we're dead and gone, they'll live on.
Even when I'm looking at your tornado hips,
Or your avalanche smile,
I'll be thinking of those forest fires,
'Cause they burn the brightest in my heart.
I AmI am single,
but I am loved.
I am not a genius,
but I am intelligent.
I am not breathtaking,
but I have beauty.
I am not a saint,
but I am kind.
To the world,
I am not perfect.
But for someone,
Two Years LaterShe asked him gently, “Do you love me?”
In his long silence, she found closure,
And left her love under a willow tree.
lung canceri will die with your name on my lips
because there is nothing else i'll need to say.
you are my coffin, my funeral pyre.
as my bones disintegrate, popping and snapping,
you will greedily swallow my ashes
until nothing is left of me but secondhand smoke.
i've danced with you, love, across hospital tile,
the scent of antiseptic cloying as valentine's chocolate.
you dipped me into unconsciousness,
and i willingly closed my eyes.
the intrusion of your scalpel teeth no longer scares me.
you, my rigor mortis soul mate, always take me under.
your tent of frostbitten shelter pulls me down, an anchor,
while i gag on pills too abstract to save me.
forgive me, lungs, of my cigarette abuse,
but i've found happiness in a reaper's cloak.
i find comfort in these carcinogens.
i've made my nest in a swaying tree,
my body destroyed by the nauseous rocking.
they smile at me with pity in their eyes,
scribbling nonsense on those jaw-like clipboards.
their crisp, stark white world still has faith in me,
you've been dead for a year, my deari met you on december 21st,
the longest night of the year.
you had solstice eyes: cold, dark, alluring.
i knew you were not meant to last,
powerful as a gale but fragile as
the tulip stems you snapped,
a sickening cycle of you,
an overwhelming tidal wave.
they say two wrongs will never make a right,
but i made so many bad choices that
i wound up back where I began.
it was too easy to love you,
but getting you to love me back was impossible.
i clawed at your chest until I struck blood,
until my nails split into shards.
you were born a phantom,
and i, your corpse.
holding onto you felt like drowning in quicksand;
i fought but always sank into your arms.
i breathed in dirt, breathed in dust, and
found my organs choked with you,
smothered by your existence.
you sucked out my breath
every time i kissed you.
i died every day with your hand
knotted in my hair.
You left on june 21st,
the longest day of the year.
i bit down sorrow and deconstructed
the labyrinth within me,
the one you hadn't th
I give upSometimes
I try so hard to change for people
Do what they want,
Listen to their critiques,
Try to be a good friend..
But you know?
Everyone makes mistakes,
is not perfect,
is tired and stressed and slips,
It is never good enough,
no matter what I do,
nobody ever sees what I changed,
everybody always only sees my faults.
I get criticised for what I did wrong,
but never acknowledged for what I changed,
I give up.
I don't have the energy anymore,
to always justify myself,
to always go up and be the one,
that is bad,
to always be the one,
Sometimes I think I'm better off without anyone...
Eye of the StormI believed I could make the wind blow,
and force the moon to shine at night,
create rainbows just by thinking,
and hold tea parties for fairies in July,
I was the queen of my own graceful lands.
Yet, I grew old and realized,
I am the kind of girl who'd trip and fall,
often for stepping on her own feet.
My crown of diamond and gold
now a rusted piece of bronze,
I lost my throne to treason, my kingdom to hate,
I became the eye of a hurricane,
loaded with mishaps I need to atone.
I felt the soft touches of angels,
and lost my own wings to demons who could crush stone.
Felt the scorching tears run so often,
I knew I must have hit bottom low.
I had nothing holy, no one to call dear,
but here I am, the starting point of my own storm.
I felt fear, clung to shadows,
encased my heart within marble walls,
and threw the keys that can unlock my soul.
So many chances I've lost with no love to seek,
and so many people I turned my back to.
I let the darkness gnaw through my bones.
A stranger walked up to me today...A man walked up to me and asked me for a cigarette… I told him I didn't smoke anymore, and he asked me why? ––I answered "because the person I used to smoke with, isn't around anymore", and he replied…"that's why I smoke."
A woman walked up to me and asked me for drugs, I replied "I have several in store…his eyes, his smile, his hands"…she whispered, "that's not a drug"…and I laughed as I said.. "if only you knew."
A child walked up to me today and asked me to play a game, I told them I was too tired to play games, i'd been playing for years, they replied…"then you must be a pro!", to which I said "yes…a pro at losing."
An old woman stared at me today, and I asked her…"is something wrong?" she answered "I was about to ask you the same question."
© Rocio Belinda Mendez
Blowing a featherThe way she blows this feather
All of them screw their knees,
Falling for her.
Blessed by a blue-eyed breeze
All of them crave an eternal embrace.
Gardens of golden flowers
Reflected stars on the water's surface
So many gifts she justly deserves
The rose-coloured feather,
Gift from heavens,
Brings daylight to a sinner
She's an angel without wings
The NumbWaves crashing, smashing,
Dashing all hopes,
Lashing me to my deathbed.
Bottle pressed to my lips,
Here comes the Numb
And as the liquid passes
I hear my last drum.
Booming bass tones,
Earth cracking beneath me,
I press the bottle to my gullet...
Here comes the Numb.
Strong hints of fire
Trace down my soaked throat,
Flashes of thought echo
Only to be silenced,
The Numb's telling me to let go.
Then it all comes crashing back,
The waves, the splitting earth,
The fire flying so high in the sky.
The Numb is back to claim me.
The Numb is here to drag me back,
Back to a hole somewhere,
So I can be covered by the Numb.
And that's alright, the Numb takes the pain away,
The Numb is my friend, it stops what I fear most these days,
The Feelings are the enemy,
They take my wit away from me,
Whenever I feel I get cut back down.
I want to grow,
I want to show everyone
That I can bloom.
The Numb won't help me grow,
But at least when I'm numb,
I don't feel... I don't get cut.
AerosolIt has been a day and a half since the crash, and I have found a cabin. In some ways, this is a relief. I don’t know if I could face another night on the mountain without shelter. Outside, a fire does no good: the heat simply travels upwards. However, this place also raises some difficult questions. I estimate that I’ve put eight miles between myself and the crash site. I don’t know if this will be enough. It Saving...
occurs to me that I don’t really know anything.
The survival manual recommends staying with the plane. It explains that this affords the best chance of rescue. It explains that the wreckage offers warmth and shade. It explains that seventy percent of pilots who stay are located within three days, while seventy percent of those who leave are
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